Reflections on One Year of COVID-19 Lockdowns: Part II
Bonsoir mes amis (good evening my friends). Happy Thursday! Yes, Thursday, as in not Tuesday when I said I would post but I digress. I’m still getting the hang of blogging again and in trying to be disciplined with my time. Some days I hit the mark; other days I have to remember to be kind to myself when I don’t. But today’s post is not on my time-management skills and rather Part II of a reflection post I started last week. I’ve tagged it here for convenience.
Despite spending about nine weeks in France’s very strict lockdown that started last March, 2020 was not an entirely bad year for me in terms of personal development. I’ll be very blunt here: I went through a break-up in May and two months later I lost someone who was like a mother to me. But I was also living on my own for the first time and in a city that felt like home from the moment I arrived. I was unhappy with my schooling (both abroad and back home), but I also graduated with two B.A.’s in December. My family couldn’t come visit me abroad and yet my father and I grew closer than ever.
When I look back on my life last year, I really cannot believe that I’m where I am now. I didn’t recognize how much the ups and downs had changed me until I tried to put myself in the same headspace and realized I’ve outgrown this previous version of myself. Writing this post isn’t easy, which tells me that I still have things to work out. That’s okay, I knew that. But what I also know is that I’m a lot stronger, independent, and open-minded than I give myself credit for. Or perhaps I only became this way as a result of last year. I suppose that depends on what your opinion of personal development is.
These changes became apparent to me in the retelling of stories and facts about myself. For example: I don’t like trying new foods and I especially never liked the idea of escargot. Yet, I tried it and really enjoyed it. I love to sleep in and would never consider myself a morning person. Yet, I was happy to wake up early (even on the weekends) and start my morning routine. When deciding where to travel, I was keen on seeing places where I’d know the language. Yet, I lived in France despite never having taken a French language course. Part of me still can’t believe how much I’ve grown as a result of my life this previous year.
It is only when I reflect and discuss things that my growth becomes apparent to me, and as a result, I’ll be doing more of that on here. I learn a lot from other people’s example and experiences and in this manner I hope that sharing these things with you will help you. I’m no expert in this, just someone who is committed to becoming the best version of herself after many years of hiding away behind negativity and self-doubt.
xo
